I know it is shocking... but I LOVE to worship Jesus through song.Love it.
Some Sundays, I kick off my shoes to worship in the sanctuary. I do it at my seat, or on the stage, wherever I am. Sometimes I need to be reminded that where I am standing is Holy ground. Sometimes I need to remember that worship is not at all about me, or my voice, or how much I love to sing. So, sometimes, my shoes must leave my feet and I use that "symbol" to remind me that I am on Holy ground. I am in the presence of the Almighty God.
To me, Worship is about remembering that God is worthy of the whole mess of our lives. He is worth risking everything - even losing everything if He can gain glory in the midst of it all. He is worthy. Worship serves as a reminder to me, and it is an offering to Him. Worship is not about the posture of my body, but the posture of my heart. It isn't about the position of my hands, but rather the position of my spirit.
Rarely am I offended. I will be honest here. I used to be offended all the time. I wore my heart on my sleeve and was easily hurt by the words and actions of others. My pastor loved me enough to tell me that the reason I was like that was because I was full of PRIDE. He was right. I was so concerned with myself - and thought everyone else should be too. I had to spend some time evaluating how my hurt feelings made me prideful - but in a backwards way - it is just a reality. Anyway, since that time, I have practiced the art of capturing my thoughts. And I have determined, there just really isn't much to get offended about. No one has to like me. No one has to go out of their way for me. God through Jesus has already proven to me that I am loved, and I have been sacrificed for. The ultimate gift, the ultimate love already resides with me - through Jesus - and that is more than sufficient for me. So, why waste energy and time giving power to other people (in my mind) that they shouldn't hold over me? I know this is a long train of thought, but stick with me here...
I was offended on Sunday. But, it has served a great purpose.
Someone went to the sound crew after the first service and asked them to tell the worship leader to ask me to put my shoes on during worship. Now, granted, I was on the stage, so it would have been noticeable to more people that I wasn't wearing shoes - it wasn't that my feet stunk (I hope)... but something deep inside of me burned - red hot. At first, I really was pretty sure it was a righteous anger - and some of it might have been. Here is the thought process...
"How dare you! How dare you stand and tell someone how they should position themselves before the Lord? How dare you not come to me directly? How dare you stand in this worship center and be focused on anything other than God... seriously, whether or not I wear shoes affects your worship experience? Why are you here if you are going to focus on something besides God?"
Then, I reasoned with myself - "become all things to all men.. to the Jews a Jew, to the Greeks a Greek..." and I had this prideful thought, "He didn't say, 'to the Pharisees a Pharisee'"... or did He not mean that when He said all thing to all men?
Oh, wait.
Yep, there it was. My flesh - all out there to deal with. It was brought to my attention right before the second service, so it was after I had already offended this person with the absence of my shoes, but, right before it was time to honor my King through song. And I was groping for Truth. I was flailing around in my mind trying to come around to right thinking - and being mad that my worship was being invaded by someone else's opinions.
Don't get me wrong, I had already put my shoes on for second service. Praise the Lord, He reminded me of this - "submit therefore to one another out of reverence for Christ." It is all about revering Christ, so those shoes were going on my feet. I literally didn't want my shoes to make someone else stumble. But, I am still so uncertain of the correct way to approach this. I have had a jumbled up mixture of these thoughts:
* I am only in worship to worship the Almighty God - He alone determines my response in worship.
* I am to submit to fellow believers out of reverence for Christ.
* I will worship as I am lead by the Spirit
* I will consider others better than myself
* I will not let any person tell me how I should worship
* I will become all things to all men so that some might be saved.
So, how far do you take that? On either end? I love to raise my arms in worship, but if I know it is causing others to stumble do I not do it? I believe Paul would say, "By no means!" Authentic worship draws people to Jesus. It is not about showmanship. It is not about pretense, or posture. It is about a relationship that elicits a response. Some days, that means I dance around a little, some days that means I raise my hands, sometimes it means I get on my face, and sometimes it means I don't sing at all.
But, dare I take my shoes off again in worship? I don't know why the person was offended - or mentioned this. Maybe they thought that I was irreverent for not wearing shoes. Maybe, it was offensive to them because it seemed dishonoring to God. I don't know. For heaven's sake, I wish they would have come and talked to me. But, here are some things I have gleaned from this...
* Maybe sometimes when I took my shoes off it was more of a symbol and less of an attitude in my heart. That is something to work out in my mind for sure.
* Maybe sometimes - in my own pew - I will kick off my shoes after all.
* Maybe sometimes it is okay to adjust my posture to show my affections to Christ through submission to another brother or sister in the body.
* Maybe sometimes I will worship without considering anyone but the Almighty God and my affections for Him.
* Maybe it is time to address this idea of Worship in a corporate setting. Maybe our focus needs some refocusing.
* Maybe, in the long run, I am better off because I had to wrestle - right there on the stage (and much at home as well) - with this offense.
* Maybe, in the long run, it doesn't really matter where my shoes are as long as my motive is pure.
* God knows the thoughts before we have them, the needs before we say them, and the deeds before we do them. He alone can judge the hearts of men.
* What is your motive in worship? Is it to sing on cue, on pitch, and "look the part" - or is it to simply be in awe of the One who made all the heavenly hosts? Is it to tell God that He is ever faithful and good and right and trustworthy?
* On a day to day basis, worship might just be spelled M-O-T-I-V-E
Jesus, help us to worship you in Spirit and in Truth. Help us to be mindful of your sacrifice - and just what that should mean to us in every activity we undertake. Come, Lord Jesus and rescue us from these decaying bodies! Thank you that your love is perfect, and it is enough. Thank you that one day we will not be constantly pulled towards sin and the flesh. Thank you that you loved me even as I wrestled on the stage - even when I made something that is always about you - about me. Thank you for your never ending, all sustaining grace. You are good.
